BY MIEMIEBEE
“Baki jini bane?” Ya tambayeta tare da d’age gira.
“Naji Sir” ta amsa a hankali. “Good and one more thing, learn to call me Anas in public. Bareyi kina kiran boyfriend naki sir ko Mr. ba. Am I clear?” Wani banbarak’wai maganganunsa suka sauk’a a kunnenta, ita rabuwan ta data kira sa da asalin sunan sa tun kafin ta fara masa aiki ta riga ta saba da Boss ko Sir ko Mr. Fauzi. “But Sir na riga na saba.” ta fad’a.
“Seki saba da Anas d’in shima. Yanzu rufo min k’ofar mota.” Ba gardama ta rufe, basu tsaya ko ina ba se babban shopping mall dake Maiduguri bayan yayi parking ya juyo ya kalleta kallonsan take itama amman take ta kau da kanta. “So kinga cikin mutane zamu shiga am now your boyfriend dan haka karki kirani da wani suna banda Anas, clear?” Kai ta giad’a a hankali. “Me zamuyi anan amma?” Ta tanbayesa.
“What else? To shop for you.” Ta kai da bud’e k’ofarta kenan ya dakatar da ita “wait, I’m your boyfriend ko kin manta ne? Let me.” Hannunta ta mayar tana jiransa bayan minti d’aya k’ofarta ya bud’u. Hannunsa ya mik’o mata a yayinda ta tsaya tana kallansa dan bata san me zata masa ba. “Grab my hand” yace da ita romantically.
“Sir-” kallo ya watsa mata “I mean Anas kai fa kace ba body contact.”
“If we are alone ba, yanzu kuma cikin mutane zamu shiga we have to pretend like other lovers do, now grab my hand.”
“Sir I mean Anas amman haramun ne ba kyau, you are not yet my husba-” bata k’are maganar ba yakama hannunta tare da fito da ita daga motar. Janta ya fara suna tafiya se k’ok’arin k’watan hannunta take takasa, bece mata komai ba sanda suka iso daidai gaban k’ofar ya tsaya ya kalleta. Chak itama ta tsaida damben k’watan hannun ta datake kanta a sunkuye.
“Fannah” ya kira sunanta abinda be tab’a yi a gabanta ba. “Stop it okay? Behave yourself.” A haka suka shiga cikin mall d’in idanu ne sosai akansu dan ko ba’a tab’a ganin Mr. Fauzi da mace ba segashi yau da PA’rsa. Wani business colleague nasa ne dayazo shopping shima da family’nsa ya gansa.
“Mr. Fauzi” ya danna masa kira from far behind atare Fannah da Anas suka juya suna kallon inda suka jiyo muryar. Anas na ganinsa yakira sunansa shima “hey Mr. Mahmoud!” bayan Mr. Mahmoud sun k’ariso da matarsa sukayi hand shake sannan akayi gaisuwa. “This is Miss Aleeyu your PA ko?” Mr. Mahmoud ya tambaya.
“Yes this is Fanna” ya sake rik’o hannunta gam da nasa yana mirzawa a hankali, electric sparks Fannah tajiyo cikin jikinta. “My girlfriend.”
“Your girlfriend?” Mr. Mahmoud ya nanata abinda Anas ya fad’i cike da mamaki a iya saninsa de Anas baida time na girlfriends.
“Yes!” Anas ya jaddada masa, “she is no more my PA right *BABE?* ” Ya juyo yana kallon Fannah. Rasa na cewa tayi chan k’asa k’asa cike da kunya tace, “yy..yyess” ta nisanta “honey ” Wani shu’umin murmushi Anas ya saki. “So Mr. And Mrs. Mahmoud semun sake had’uwa girlfriend ita tanada gajan hak’uri kar mu b’ata mata lokaci se anjima.”
“Ayi shopping lafiya Mr. And Mrs Fauzi.” A haka sukayi sallama, hannunta rik’e cikin nasa suka nufa wajen inner wears. Me kuma zamuyi anan? ta tambayi kanta a zuci. Me kula kayan wajen tana ganin Mr. Fauzi ta soma washe hak’wara “Mr. Fauzi you’re welcome have a sit please.”
“No thanks” yace mata tare da k’arisowa gabanta da hannun Fannah cikin nasa. “Dubata wani size ne ze mata.” Baki wangalau Fannah ta bud’e cike da mamaki da kunya gabad’ai wai mesa Mr. Fauzi baida kunya ne? Hijabinta ta hura sede its too late matar ta riga tayi figuring out komai. “Lets say maxi B cup.” “Okay thanks” yace da ita tare da jan hannun Fannah suka shige ciki, wajen bra zalla ya kaita bi yake yana duba tags na jikin bras d’in har ya kai kan tag B hannunsa ya raba da nata tare da d’iban bras d’in ba iyaka ya jibge mata ajiki, da sauri ta tare a hijabinta.
“Sir I mean Anas meh haka? Its embarrasing dan Allah ka bari.”
“What so embarrasing Fannah? You are my girlfriend me aciki dan na saya miki inner wears?” Wani sabon row ya kwasa ya sake zuba mata cikin hijabinta. Janta yayi zuwa side na panties yana duddubawa chan ya d’aga guda d’aya yana duddubawa a sama “Mr. Fauzi I mean Anas dan Allah kabari kar a ganka.” Banza yayi da ita tare da ajiyewa, wani daban ya sake d’agawa shima da be masa ba ya sake d’ago wani.
“Saboda Allah Mr. Fauzi kabari.”
“I won’t stop se kin fad’a min size naki.”
“NOO!!” ta fad’a da ihu.
“Then fine haka zan cigana da nema har sena samu.” Haka yatayi har wucewa ake ana nuna su. Ganin ba mahalicci se Allah ta rufe ido kawai “Sir size na hannun kan ne.” Juyowa yayi kalle ta dawani shu’umin murmushi a fuskarsa. “Good” ya ce da ita kalan size d’in ya riga d’iba har rows uku ganin kayakin sun soma mata yawa ya buk’aci akawo masu trolley dam ya cika d’aya da inner wears zalla sekace kayan lefe ze had’a. “Anas ya isa please ina zan kai wad’annan kayaki?”
“Basu miki bane akawo wasu desingers d’in daban?”
“NOOO MR. FAUZI!!!” Ta masa ihu, trolley’n yaja tare da rik’e hannunta wajen biya suka nufa ya ajiye tare da jawo wani trolley’n daban. Siyayya na fitan hankali yayi wa Fannah tun tana yabari har tagaji, shi kansa be bari taji total amout d’in ba. Har gaban gida ya kaita yasa yara suka shiga da kayakin ciki. “So are you telling Mami ko in shiga in fad’a mata da kaina?”
“Zan fad’a mata da kaina.”
“Yaushe yanzu?”
“A’a se in bikin ya kusa.”
“Kina nufin har se na gama gina gidan tukunnah?”
“Yes Sir.”
“Lallai kam!” yayi exclaiming. K’ofarsa ya bud’e yafita tare da bud’o nata. Hannunta yaja ya fito da ita sannan yasoma janta zuwa cikin gidansu. “Mr. Fauzi dan Allah kar ka shiga zan fad’a mata da kaina.”
“When gobe jibi? I don’t have that time.” Already su Mami suna tsaye jikin kayakin duk mamaki ne d’auke karara a fuskarsu da Afrah harda Aiman. “Laaaa Mami kiga harda bressier” cewar Aiman. D’aya taciro “kuma wallahi daidai dana ya Fannah ne ko Ya Afrah.” Daidai lokacin su Anas suka iso tsakar gidan bra d’in Mami ta amsa tare da b’oye wa a bayanta ganin Mr. Fauzi.
“Sannu dazuwa” ta musu duka. Bayan an shimfid’a musu tabarma suka zazzauna, sede Anas yak’i sakin hijabin Fannah dan dolenta ta zauna kusa dashi. Mamaki ne yacika Mami, Afrah kam gani take kamar a mafarki. Gyaran murya Anas yayi;
“Ermmm Mami you must be wondering me ya kawo ni nan as well as kayakin chan ko? Well Fannah and I have been wanting to tell you amman Allah be bamu iko ba.” Ya juya ya kalli Fannah tare da mata wani killer smile dataji zuciyarta na k’ok’arin fashewa dak’yar ta iya ta mayar masa da murmushin itama. “We two... We two...” Sekuma yakasa k’arisawa nanne Mami tagano bakin zaren.
“Ya Anas soyayya kuke da Ya Fannah?” Aiman ta tambaya, bakinta Mami ta buge “tashi kishiga ciki.”
“Mami nayi shiru.”
“Tashi nace!” Mami ta bud’e mata ido, a sanyaye ta tashi tashiga d’akin Baba.
“Toh Anas shine har se kai da kanka zakazo ka fad’a min? Ke Fannah meya hanaki fad’a min iyyeh?”
Kame kame ta soma “erm.. Erm...” Anas ne ya karb’eta “Mami ni na hanata saboda nayi laifi nafara soayyaya da ‘yarku ban tambayi izini wajen ki ko Baba ba, I’m sorry please.”
“Bakomai Anas nasan bada gangan kayi hakan ba, toh inde blessing d’ina kuka zo nema ni kam na baku, Allah sanya alheri, naji muku dad’i sosai.”
“Mungode Mami” cewar Anas a kunyace. “Yau ma Baba yana bacci ne inasan mu gaisa.” ya tambaya cike da girmamawa.
“A’a idansa biyu barin masa magana” nan ta fice. “Congratulations to you two” cewar Afrah. Kallo Fannah ta watsa mata a yayinda Anas yace, “thank you sistaaa.”
“Toh Ya Anas, Fannah kad’ai aka sani aka ma siyayya mufa?”
“Ke Afrah bakida hankali ne?” Cewar Fannah tana zaro mata ido.
“Toh ke me ruwanki?” Anas ya katse ta “don’t worry Afrah” hannu yasa cikin aljihunsa yaciro bundle na d’ari tare da mik’a mata. “Gashi gobe keda Aiman kuje kuyi shopping kinji? In ya kasa muku ki karb’i number na wajen Fannah ki kirani se in k’ara muku kinji?”
“Yeyy! Ya Anas mungode.” Daidai da fitowar Mami kenan “bismillah Anas kashigo” a hankali ya saki hijabin Fannah tare da mik’ewa ya nufa d’akin. “Ya Fannah ya akayi Ya Anas yasan size naki naga harda bressier ya sayamiki.”
“Afrah wallahi in baki rufa min baki ba sena cicci miki.”
“Uuuhhh! Kode harda panties ne? Soyayya dad’i” hannu Fannah ta d’aga zata bugeta take ta gudu d’akinsu wane ta cinye kud’in.
Bada dad’ewa ba Anas ya fito murmushin dake d’auke a fuskarsa kad’ai amsa ne game da tambayan ya had’uwansa da Baba ya tafi, it was a success. Mami ce ta rakosa waje “toh Anas kaide kullum seka mana wahala mungode Allah saka da alheri ya k’ara bud’i.” “Ameen Mami ni zan wuce.”
“Toh masha Allah Fannah baraki raka Anas nakin bane?” Mami ta tambayeta tana mata murmushin tsiya.
Kamar tace barin raka sa ba sekuma ta fasa tace “zan raka sa Mami.” “Yawwa toh mungode ko Anas a gaida gida.” A sanyaye ta mik’e ta bi bayansa bayan sun fito gaban gidansu yace da ita “toh Mrs. Fauzi thank you koma ciki.”
“Niba Mrs Fauzi bace tunda ba’ayi auren ba tukuna.”
“Ohonki nide adena so ana kaiwa kasuwa. Cikin jakar inner wears d’in akoi kud’in d’inki ciki also akwai wani paper da phone number rubuce ajiki, number’n tailor’n Amal ne naga yana k’ok’rin d’inki seki kirasa kuyi magana, okay?” Can k’asa k’asa tace “okay nagode” tare da ficewa.
Tana dawowa taga su Afrah kan kayan se bud’e bud’e sukeyi. Sanda ta ganta sannan ta soma maganar; “ai dama Mami na fad’a miki akoi b’oyayyen al'amari tsakanin Ya Fannah da Ya Anas bakiga kullum tana zuwa office ba.” Yi tayi kamar bata jita ba takai da shiga d’akinsu kenan Mami ta kira sunanta “Fannah! tsaya” chak ta tsaya. Mami ce ta k’ariso wajen ta “mu shiga daga ciki.” Bayan sun shiga suka zauna kan gado Mami tasa hannunta cikin na Fannah.
“Fannah shin kin sanar da Anas labarinki kuwa? Banasan ku gina relationship kan k’arya ki fad’a masa komai akanki please dukda da k’yar ne agane wani d’a na miji ya tab’a shiganki amman yakamata ki sanar dashi, k’arya ba abar yi bace.”
Rasa na fad’i tayi.
“Fannah Habibti kinyi shiru ko baki fad’a masa bane?”
Qarya ta mata; “ko kad’an Mami, karki damu na sanar dashi komai ahakan kuma yace yana sona ze aureni, ya kuma buk’ace ni da kar in sake kawo masa zancen koda wasa same goes to you to please Mami, maganan ya wuce kar mu sake d’agowa.”
“Toh Alhamdulillah na matuk’ar jin dad’i wallahi, mahak’urci mawadaci kinga amfanin hak’uri kenan. Yanzu koda Ya Khaleel ya dawo se mu fad’a masa kinada mijin da zaki aura.”
“Mami Baffah Khaleel ma bare sake dawowa ba sabida a yanzu haka Ya Farouq yana cell...” nan ta labarta wa Mami komai. Ba abinda Mami ke inbanda sunbud’a wa Anas albarka.
****
Shima Anas d’in daga gidansu Fannah gida ya zarce cinye sa ne kawai su Ummie basuyi ba dan murnan ganinsa da sukayi. Abuu, Shettima kowa yaji dad’in ganinsa. Bayan sun gama cin abinci ya dawo d’akinsa ya jinguna jikin gado, besan dalili ba kawai ya tsinci kansa cikin nishad’i da jin dad’i musamman inya tuna reaction na Fannah data fad’a masa size na panties nata. Knock ne yazo daga k’ofar sa. “Come” yace.
Shettima ne yashigo ya nemi waje ya zauna kusa dashi. “So Ya Anas ina kashiga kwana biyu ka kusan sama Ummie hawan jini Amal kuma ciwon hauka?”
“Nowhere maza just that I needed space to think.”
“Sure?” Ya tamabayesa yana wani murmushin tsiya.
“Yau kuma dawani surutun ka taho?” Ya tambayesa.
Well d’azu aka kirani w“ai an ganga a mall kai da Fannah kuna shopping.”
“Mutane da gulma!” abinda yace kenan.
“Aww dagaske ne kenan?”
“Nima ban sani ba” ya amsa sa a takaice. “Tashi ka fita ma please don’t ruin my day. Nifa na fad’a maka ba san Fannah nake ba I’m just using her and thats all.”
“Toh in tayi tsami mua ji nide a dage ko weekend ne a kawo mana ita muyi spedning.” Pillow Anas ya d’aga ya wulla masa wanda Shettima yasamu yayi dodging ya fice a guje yana dariya. Shikansa Anas dariyan yake.
*****
Da tunanin Fannah wanda keson zama masa jiki yayi bacci. Sede mafarkin Ummimi daya kwan biyu beyi ba yayi yau. A firgice ya tashi yana gumi yana nishi, k’ark’ashin gadonsa inda yake adana bottle d’aya zuwa biyu saboda situations like this in yayi mafarki yasha ya d’au d’aya ya bud’e. Har ya kai baki sekuma ya kasa sha yayi promsing Fannah bare sake sha ba, rufewa yayi. Wata zuciyar tace masa toh ai ko kasha barata sani ba tunda ba ganinka take ba. Nan ya bud’e ya sake kai baki nan ma yakasa sha. “Oh God! NO!!!” Toilet ya nufa ya juye a bathroom yayi flushing haka yayi da d’ayan ma, sannan ya koma ya kwanta. Ina fa, bacci ya gagara, mafarkin Ummimi se hunting nasa yake.
Wayarsa ya d’ago daga kan side drawer yaga k’arfe 1:20AM. Miyarwa yayi ya sake kwanciya daga ya rufe ido se mafarkin Ummimi ya dawo daga inda ya tsaya. Yayi hakan sau uku kawai ya hak’ura da baccin inda giyansa na nan da yana sha nan da ‘yan mintuna zeyi everlasting bacci, duk laifin Fannah ne ita tasa sa yayi making promise kan bare sake shaye shaye ba, yanzu haka ita tana bacci shi yana nan yana wahala sede ayi 2-0. Wayarsa ya sake d’agowa yaga 1:40AM kan lambarta yakai ya danna mata kira.
****
Fannah na cikin baccinta me dad’in bala’i tajiyo ringing na wayarta ita tama rasa meya hanata sawa a silent har yagama ringing bata d’aga ba se a karo na biyu. Cikin bacci ta d’aga “hello” dan ko duba wake kira batai ba.
“Miss Aleeyu” ya kira sunanta ai take ta nemi baccin nata ta rasa.
“Mr. Fauzi”,takira sunan sa cike da mamaki. “Me ya faru da daren nan?” Torchi ta haska taga k’arfe d’aya ne.
“I can’t sleep” yace da ita sincerely.
“Toh Mr. Fauzi nikuma me zan maka?”
“Nima bansani ba all I know is that is your fault.” Hamma ta saki tare da zaro idanu “nikuma Sir? Mena maka?”
“You made me promised to you that barin sake shan wani abu ba, I’m badly in need of that now kuma na kasa sha, because I can’t break my promise to you!” ya fad’a ad’an tsawace.
“Is okay calm down Mr. Fauzi, calm down okay? Karka sha please, zaka iya tashi zuwa kitchen?” ta tambayesa a hankali cikin murya me sanyi.
“Yes” yace mata.
“Good you are going to make your coffee, trust me in kasha you’ll go back to sleep peacefully but please kar ka sha wancan abun you promised, kaji Mr. Fauzi?”
“Naji” yace tare da mik’ewa zuwa kitchen d’in. Haka tana fad’a masa directions d’in yana bi har ya had’a sede koda ya tab’a be kai nata dad’i ba.
“It didn’t work Miss Aleeyu, ni barinsha ba.”
“Yi hak’uri kasha, first thing gobe I’ll come to your office in had’a maka kaji? Yi hak’uri kasha wannan d’in please will you do that for me?” Shiru yayi bece komai ba “please” ta rok’esa.
“Okay” ya fad’a can k’asa k’asa.
“Sleep good okay? Gobe da safe zan zo in had’a maka coffeen kaji?”
“Naji” yace karap ta katse wayar. Da k’yar ya iya shanye rabin coffeen. Kasancewar ba Fannah ce ta had’a masa ba, sam ya kasa bacci amman dan yadda muryarta ke yawo masa a kai besan lokacin daya koma bacci ba.
*© miemiebee*
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