‘YAR GATA CE!

     Tun daga ranan da Adeel yaji daga bakin Zeezee da kuma kunnuwansa kan ta tafi bazata sake dawo masa ba, he can't ever have her back ya miyar da life nasa useless. Ba aikinsa sede kullum yaje bar and get himself drunk, aikin office ma ya yanke zuwa ba kuma wai ya tura musu notice bane, Mami tayi surutu har ta gaji. Sa'an sa d'aya, Boss nashi was once a friend to his Dad if not da tuni yayi firing nashi.
   Ruky kam kullum cikin habaici da zaginsa take musamman ma idan ta tuna da about 2weeks kenan yanzu ya yanke mata weekly allowances nata. Sam ba jituwa a tsakaninsu kullum cikin tashin hankali sekace Tom and Jerry. Adeel bema aza Ruky aka ba ko zaginsa take sede ya saurareta ya kad'a kai saboda rashin Zeezee kad'ai ya ishesa damuwa, da haka fa Adeel ya soma neman mata amman bawai fasik'anci yake dasu ba sede yayi dating nasu suci mai kud'i ahaka har suka dace da wata 'yan mata wanda a birthday'n wata cousin nasa suka had'u da ita, abu kaman wasa-wasa Adeel idan ya fita tun safe se kusan goman dare ko sha d'aya ya dawo as kullum yana cikin partying. Office daya koma ma ba kullum yake zuwa ba, sosai staying late nashi ya soma damun Ruky, she can't remember when last ma abu ya shiga tsakaninta da Adeel, she needs her husband atleast. Yau ma as always se 10:56pm Adeel ya bugo Genesis nasa ya dawo gida, alokacin Ruky na tsaye a parlour tana jiransa tana sanye ne da free size rigan bancinta riga da wando. Yana bud'e k'ofan sega tanan tsaye, tsuka yaja sannan ya maida k'ofan ya rufe.
 
   "Adeel!" Ta kirasa in a serious tone.
   "Lafiya?" Ya amsa in an I dont care tone.
   "Daga ina kake?"
  "Daga k'aniyan ki nake, mschw! Ina ruwanki da inda naje? Wake ajiye wani tsakani na dake?"
  "Ba abinda na tambaya ba kenan daga ina kake nace?"
  "So kike kiji? Daga french party'n friend d'ina, aikin banza kawai!"
  "Party? Ko kunya baka ji ba? Da aurenka kake zuwa party?"
  "Kunya? Sata nayi?  Da da muke zuwa taren ba auren Zeezee a kaina ne?"
  "Zeezee kace nikuwa Ruky Mama ce, ita taga zata iya nide wallahi ba'a gidana ba, ba yadda za'ayi ka fita chan kana partying nikuma ka barni da yima gadi, wai bama wannan ba rabonka da kabani hak'k'i na since when?"
  "LOL. Ai seki fito fili kice Adeel I need you bawai ki tsaya kina bin long process ba."
   "Wait, wait tsaya Mallam karka kuskura wallahi koda wasa, kace zaka soma kula matan wajen nan don wallahi bazan yarda ba."
   "Zeezee ma ta hak'ura bale ke d'in banza, kin gadama kada kiyi mschw!" Yana kaiwa nan ya nufi d'akinsa.
   "Adeel baka sanni bane wallahi baka san Ruky Mama ba" tace da kanta, "idan Zeezee ta barka kasani Ruky baza ta barka ba, mu zuba mu gani." Rai a dak'ule ta wuce d'akinta. Washegari Ruky ta kira wata friend nata party rocker akan tayo mata bincike either dagaske Adeel nada girlfriend a waje or not.
   "I've got this Babe karki damu."
   "Yauwa Ammatas thank you." Ahaka sukayi sallama. Tun safe as always yauma ya shirya ya fita, da yamma friend na Ruky tayi calling nata back inda take jaddada mata cewa yes its true Adeel is currently dating wata Babe sunanta Nusaiba amman da Nusee ake kirarta.
   "Babe are you serious please?" Ruky tayi maganan cike da k'in yarda.
  "Wallahi, ko jiya ma sunje wani French Party da ita." Nan Ruky ta sake gaskata zancen saboda Adeel da bakinsa jiya ya gaya mata daga French party yake.
  "Thank you Ammatas, aikin ki yayi kyau."
   "Take it easy Babe na sanki."
  "Wani irin easy? Barni dashi."

  Da goshin Maghrib Adeel ya dawo gida yau unlike yadda ya saba, Ruky na kallonsa ya wuce d'akinsa seda ta tabbata ya shiga bayi ta bi bayansa, jin alaman gudun ruwa ta tabbata wanka yake, hakan yasa ta k'arisa ciki ta d'au wayarsa, unluckily ta samu yasa lock na pattern. Dabara ce ta fad'o mata ta lak'uta vaseline kad'an ta shafa kan screen d'in yadda da zaran ya zana pattern d'in design d'in ze fito. Fita tayi da sauri jin ya kashe tap d'in. Anan ta la6e bakin k'ofa tana kallonsa. Kaya yasa me kyau ya feffeshe jikinsa da turare, duk anan kallonsa take seda taga ya d'aga wayansa ya bud'e sannan ta fad'a d'akin da sauri stopping him from what he is about doing.
 
   "Lafiya? Zaki fad'o min d'aki ba sallama?"
  "Baby wallahi tsaka! Tsaka a parlour."
    "Mschww! Shine me?"
  "Baby please ka kashe wallahi bana son abin ko kad'an."
  "Ni dake waya yi kalan zefi wani iya kashe tsaka? Abeg fita min daga d'aki." Isowa tayi har gabansa a maraice "Baby please kayi hak'uri ka kashe min, Allah banason abin" Kallonta ya tsaya yi yana nazari nan ta samu daman amshe wayan nasa a nitse "please Baby."
   "Yana ina?" Ya tambayeta yana mata mugun kallo.
  "A parlour Baby."
  "Muje."
  "Kayi hak'uri kaje kai d'aya wallahi tsoro nakeji."
  "You are not serious, nasan ta inda yake ne da zakice inje ni kad'ai?"
  "Ta wajen 2 seater." One more look yayi mata sannan ya fice nan ta rufe wayar nasa nan pattern daya bi ya zana yayi unlocking wayar nasa ya bayyana. Bi tayi ta zana and luckily ya bud'u, rufewa tayi ta sake gwadawa, biro taja da wuri cikin drawer ta zana pattern d'in a hannunta. Tana cikin yi tajiyo kiran Adeel "Ruky! Ruky!"
   "Na'am Baby" Tayi maganan tana miyar da pen d'in. "Zo!" ya buk'aceta. Kaman dagaske ta fice tana wani kaffa-kaffa irin tana tsoron nan.
  "Ina tsaka yake anan?"
  "Allah akwai Baby ka duba da kyau."
  "Kinsan ba d'anki bane ni da zakina min wasa da hankali ko?"
   "Baby dagaske ba wasa da hankali nake maka ba, I saw it se inde ya gudu ne."
  "Mschww!" yaja tsuka tare da yasar da broom dake hannunsan ya koma d'aki. Binsa tayi da harara "bari in tabbatar da zargina zaka sani." Within two minutes ya fito tsaf ba k'aramin shigansa shirin yayi ba. "Baby ina zaka je?" Tayi maganan tsaye a dining area.
   "Fita zanyi kinada case ne?"
  "A'a wani irin case kuma? nace ko zakaci diner before going out."
  "Basshi bana jin yunwa."
  "Haba mana Baby se inyi ma girki kace kuma bazaka ci ba?"
  "Ruky" ya kirata yana me k'ura mata ido tare da examining nata.
   "Na'am Baby." Ta amsa cikin sanyin murya.
  "Stop baby'ing me and tell me what you are upto I know you."
  "Kaman ya kuma Baby?"
  "Inma kud'i kikeso ki kwantar da hankalinki kisa shi a ruwan sanyi bazaki samu ba dan har yanzu ban sauk'o daga satan da kika min ba."
   "Yanzu Baby ni shikenan ban isa inyi maka abu ba sekace dan kud'i nakeyi?"
  "Ai halinki ne money monger kawai."
  "Toh ni ba masifa nakeso ba abinci ne na girka maka kazo kaci."
  "Banaso."
  "Please mana" tayi maganan moving closer to him, hannunsa ta d'aga ta had'a da nata tana murzawa pleasurably "zo muje kaci I'll be the one to feed you." Zeyi magana tayi saurin katsesa, "don't say no please." A nitse tajasa zuwa dining table d'in tare da ja mai kujera ya zauna nan ta iba masa a plate sannan ta shiga feeding nasa. Suna gamawa ya miqe "toh ni zan fita."
  "Seka dawo Baby, Allah ya tsare."
 "Ameen" har ya fita sekuma ya dawo ya ajiye mata 2k akan table d'in.
  "Name wannan kuma?" Ta tambaya as if bata buk'ata.
  "Kisa kati a wayanki."
  "Baby you don't have to inada kati a wayana."
  "Ki d'auka banason dogon surutu, mutum yana so yana kaiwa kasuwa." Ignoring what he said tace;
  "Toh nagode, I love you." Kai kawai ya mata nodding  sannan ya fice.


****
   Duk irin baccin dake tak'ura mata ranan tak'i yi ta zauna jiran dawowan Adeel. Wani arnen sleeping dress dake exposing jikinta gabad'aya ne a jikinta, tasha kwalya sosai se k'amshi ke tashi daga jikinta. Kamar mayya tak'i bacci se to 12am tajiyo shigowan Adeel, nan ta koma ciki ta sake feffeshewa da turare sannan tazo ta bud'e k'ofar alokacin da yake k'ok'arin bud'e wa shima.
   "Wow!" Yayi exclaiming a bit scared. "Ruky?"
  "Na'am Baby welcome back" tayi maganan tana matsa mishi don ya wuce, mamaki ne ya cikasa yayi tsaye wajen.
  "Ka shigo mana kar sauro su cika mana ciki." Bayan ya shigo ya tambayeta "me kike bakiyi bacci ba har yanzu?"
   "Jiranka nake, na kasa bacci." Se yanzu ma ya k'are ma face and body nata kallo "wannan kwalyan fah?"
  "Kaman ya kuma? Naka ne mana, muje na had'a maka ruwan wanka." Kallonta yake har yanzu cike da mamaki. Haka ta jasa d'aki ta miqa mai towel tare da zaman jiransa. Wayansa ta shiga nema kafin ya fito amman ta rasa da alama ya shiga bayin dashi, hakan ba k'aramin haushi ya bata ba. Bayan ya fito ta mai grabbing pajamas nasa yasa.
 
   "Zaka ci abinci?"
  "No I'm full" yayi maganan yana mik'ewa akan gado. "In kin fita ki kashe min wutan."
   "Anan zan kwana."
  "Tooohhh, d'akin kifa?"
  "Adeel I miss you can't you get it? I want my husband."
   "Koba husband ba" yayi maganan can k'asa-k'asa yana daidaita pillonsa tare da juya mata baya. Kashe wutan d'akin tayi tare da hayewa gadon "wai me zakiyi min a d'aki ne?" Ya tambaya finally.
   "Kabani hak'k'i na ni kawai."
  "Kinga am stressed out bacci nakeji ba abinda zan iya baki." Mak'irin murmushi ta sakar se mu gani tace a ranta tare da matso da pillonta kusa da nasa. Shisshige masa ta rigayi tana yimai abinda conciousness nasa baze iya d'auka ba tun yana shareta har seda tayi turning nasa in suka wula wata duniyar.

  ***
   Seda ta tabbata Adeel yayi bacci ta lalla6a a hankali yadda baza ta tayar dashi ba tasa hannunta k'ark'ashin pillonsa tare da zaro wayansa. Pattern d'in ta zana tsaf ya bud'u. Messages nasa ta soma shiga taga ba komi wajen hakan yasa ta duba call logs nan ma munafikin ya goge komi, ba kalan binciken da Ruky batayi ba a wayan Adeel but didn't find anything suspicious, hakan ba k'aramin haushi ya bata don dolenta ta koma gefensa ta kwanta.

   Washegari bayan Adeel ya fita office ta sake kiran friend nata tare da buk'atar ta da komin yayane tayi ta samo mata number'n Nusee kota k'ak'ani k'ak'a ne. Anan friend intan ke sanar da ita she should cool down and consider this work done! Ahaka ne sukayi sallama, Ruky gabad'aya ta kasa samun sukuni, ita idan Zeezee ze dawo mata da ita she don't care amman banda wata shegiya inji ta da fad'i.
   
   Har dare shiru bata ji daga bakin Safiyya (K'awarta) ba. Yau ma se 10:45pm Adeel ya dawo gida unlike jiya yau ko yimai sannu da zuwa ma Ruky batayi ba. D'akinsa ya nufa direct ya watsa ruwa bayan ya fito ya sa pajamas nasa yana cikin fesa turare wayarsa ya shiga ruri wanda tun daga parlour Ruky ke jin ringing d'in don yadda hankalinta ke a d'akinsa. Wane ita ake kira ta tashi a guje tare da lab'ewa bakin k'ofan d'akin nasa tana kallonsa. Not long enough taji yayi picking "hello My Special Star?"
   My Special Star? ta nanata a ranta bata jira ya sake wata maganan ba ta shige d'akin a zuciye. Cike da mamaki ya d'ago kai yana kallonta "ke lafiyarki kuwa?" Kafin yasake cewa wani abu har Ruky ta kar6e wayar daga hannunsa "karuwar banza karuwar wofi me bin mazajen mutane, Allah wadai dake wallahi."

   "Bakida hankali ne?" Adeel yayi maganan ransa na tafasa, yaushe Zeezee ta ta6a yimai wannan sakarci? Hannu ya miqa ze amshe wayan wanda tuni Ruky ta miyar da hannun nasa baya da nata ta rik'e gagam restraining him.
  "Hello Karuwar bata jina ne?" Har anan shiru Nusee tayi. "Ruky wallahi zan sa6a miki."
  "Sede in na sa6a maka kai da karuwar taka, maras kunya kawai dukanku." Nan ta dawo kan wayar "Nusee kike ko waye-" ding! Taji anyi hanging akanta. "Aiko ya fiye miki da sekin sha zagin da tunda asararriyar babarki ta wullo ki duniya baki ta6a sha ba karuwa kawai" tayi maganan tana glaring akan screen d'in wayan. "Bakida hankali ne? Mahaukaciya kawai!" Adeel Yayi maganan yana k'ok'arin k'wato hannunsa daga rik'on da Ruky tayi mai amman sam ya kasa dan irin d'ankaren k'arfin da takeji dashi.  
   "Zan mareki fa, ki saken hannu, sa'an ki ne ni?"
   "Wallahi ka mareni inyi zaune a ruwan cikinka. Kai wai wani irin butulu ne? Ko kunya bakaji zaka tsaya kana min firar banza firar wofi da wata karuwa a gida na?" K'arfin jikinsa kap yayi gathering sannan ya samu ya fisge hannunsa daga rik'on da tayi mai.

  "Bani waya na." Ya buk'ata.
  "Bazan bada ba" tayi stating confidently.
  "Ki bani nace!" Ya fad'a a tsawace.
  "Bazan bayar ba ka k'wata idan kanada k'arfi, wata shegiya wai ita Nusaiba Allah yasa Musiba ce wallahi baka isa ka kawo min ita gidan nan ba don gobara ne ze tashi."
  "Bayerabiyar banza, bayerabiyar wofi a haka ai zaki k'are fighting your husband kinyi asara wallahi."
  "Ka fad'i koma me waya nede bazan bada ba."
   "Idiot kita rik'ewan Allah yayi bashi kad'ai ne waya a guna ba, kuma son Nusee ne yanzu na fara sede ki mutu."
  "Ai ku maras kunya ku zaku soma mutuwa kuma za muga ya auren nan ze aiku, you are messing with the wrong bitch Adeel."
   "Jahila fita min daga d'aki, ki fita nace me k'iran samudawa kawai."
  "Ahaka ka gani kace kana so kai kuma me k'iran fulani ba" tana kaiwa nan ta kama hanyan fita da wayan nasa a hannunta. Timing nata yayi a lokaci guda ya fisge wayan nan take ta juyo. "Wallahi one more step and I'll slap you" yayi glaring at her yana nuna mata tafin hannunsa. Sanin shima Adeel mahaukacin kansa ne yana iya marintan kuma itace da asara yasa ta galla mai harara sannan ta fice. "Useless kawai" yace da ita. Tana fita yasa lock a k'ofansa. Kayan baccin nasa ya sauya zuwa wasu had'ad'd'un englisgh wears sannan ya fito yabar gidan ma gabad'aya. Ruky bata ji fitansa ba seda tajiyo k'aran gate a lokacin kuwa she can't stop him.
  "Ka fita ka dawo lafiya mark my words yau ne fitan ka na k'arshe, baka san da wa kake zancen ba wallahi." Data zo kwanciya ne ta kiran Safiyya dan jin how far with the so called Nusee's number.

  _The following day..._
   Har 11am Adeel be dawo gida ba tun fitansa jiya, hankalin Ruky gabad'aya yabi ya tashi tuna yanzu fa halan Adeel na can da Nusee suna shan love abinsu.
  Ta fannin Adeel kuwa tun jiya k'ok'arin shawo kan Nusee yake amman ya kasa saboda gabad'aya tabi ta tsorata jin kalamun Ruky, dama gata 'yar pengel-gel kaman Zeezee. Da k'yar d'in k'yar yasamu ya shawo kanta ta hak'ura bayan yayi assuring nata idan sunyi aure chan 1000 houses inda yake da gida zeje ya ajiye ta yadda Ruky ma baza ta tak'ura taba saboda ratan dake tsakanin su. Seda ya yo mata shopping sosai sannan hankalinsa ya kwanta ya dawo gida. Alokacin Ruky na tsaye bakin k'ofa tana jiransa. Yana gama shiga parlourn ta sha gabansa. "Ki matsa min kafin kiji sauk'an mari a wannan kumatun fanken naki."
  "Nak'i wallahi sede na maru amman seka bani kud'in ashoben bikin auren k'awata."
  "Allah yasa kud'in ashoben bikin mutuwan Babanki ne bana bikin auren k'awarki ba, bazan bada ba."
   "Ai wallahi bazata saku ba wai bindiga a ruwa, koban tambaya ba nasan wannan shegiyar budurwar taka kecin kud'inka ni kuma matar ka kake hanani."
  "Ina kud'in yake bale taci? Out of my way please cause ba abinda zaki samu a guna banida kud'i."
  "Ba kada kud'i? Ajinka wai bansani bane? Ba jiya aka biya ku albashi ba?"
  "Naji inada, bazan bayar ba ki daken ki kar6a."
  "Kaima kasan dukanka ba abu bane da ze gagara wallahi, kud'ina ina jira." Mugun kallo ya watsa mata sannan yazo bi ta gefenta inda tuni ta sake shan gaban sa, "kina son kisha mari da alama."
  "Wallahi se ka bani ba yadda za'ayi ita karuwar taka Nusee take kome tana cin arziki ni matarka da arzikin ka halal a kaina ka hanani."
  "Me marabarku toh? Ai du d'aya ne tun da kikazo gidan nan kin ajiye min wani abu ne?"
  "Aiko baza ka min gorin haihuwa ba tunda na hafi d'aya ya koma ne, besides ma ka fad'i koma meh wallahi kud'i ne seka bayar 10k ina jira." Ta ciro hannunta tana nuna mai nufin ya ajiye mata kud'in. Ita dariya ma tabasa ta d'ayan side nata yabi wanda har ya kaiga shiga d'akinsa tayi sauri tasha gabansa tare da rik'e handle na k'ofan "seka bani wallahi, kaji na rantse."

   Drama sosai suka shiga yi, ba yadda beyi ba don jan hannun Ruky daga jikin k'ofan amman ya kasa don irin k'arfinta, haka ba yadda ya iya don dolensa ya zaro ragowan kud'ad'en dake wajensa ya shiga irgawa don bata abinda take buk'ata. Har ga Allah dama dubu bakwai yayi niyyan bata, taje ta nemi sauran ta cikata. Yana cikin irga kud'ad'en tayi timing nasa karap! Yaji ta k'wace duka tare da sa gudu.
  "Ke meh haka? Kibani abuna kina ji ko banason sata." Dubu goma ta irga ras sannan ta ajiye masa sauran kan kujera "gashi goman na d'auka don bazaka min wayo ba" tana kaiwa nan ta nufi d'akinta ta barsa tsaye wajen out of it. "Bayerabiya" kad'ai ya iya furtawa sannan ya tattara ragowan ya wuce d'akinsa shima. "Wai yanzu shikenan haka zata na yimin abinda takeso and I can't do anything to her?" Ya tambayi kansa yana miqe kan gado. "I've got to show her am the boss even if its for once."
    A daren ranan Safiyya ta turo wa Ruky da number'n Nusee, oh she can't wait to discipline shegiya gobe.
  The following day bayan Adeel ya tafi office da misalin 01:18pm Ruky ta shirya tsaf taja motarta se zuwa gidansu Safiyya da take nan always as same size as Ruky.
   "Babe kikace kinsan gidansu ko?"
  "Eh mana ai baze 6ata min ba a ta gun Reemee clinic gidansu yake."
   "Oya oya muje kafin Adeel ya wuce gidansu don nasan ko office shegiyar bata barinsa yaje."
  "Kai Ruky Mama!" Tayi maganan tana hailing nata "Allah ki kwantar da hankalin ki, kin d'an ganta ne kuwa? A tsaye bazata ma kai Zeezee ba wallahi, taga masu irin k'iran mu ai jiki na rawa zatayi as we ask" Murmusawa Ruky tayi ta gefe sannan ta tada mota suka fice. A dai-dai gaban gidansu Nusee tayi parking tare da tambayan mai gadi ko nan ne gidansu Nusee.





  *MIEMIEBEE.         Team #YGC!🎀*
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